Nightmare

How do we define nightmares?? Must it be inclusive of some monstorous dreams, or is it plainly about something that scares us???

I chose the later of course...Its suprising to see how sub concious thought can wake us up from deep sleep in an instant thus make u wide awake for the rest of the day with no feeling of ooziness...

And that's the reason I am here making an early post. Yes, I had a nightmare...Something that not exactly scared the shit out of me, but deffinitely something that I do not wish to happen. Its about past memory. I think about this everyday, and had nightmares regarding it in the beginning, but after such a break, I had it again and as I mentioned, it knocked me to concious. I know the rest of the day going to be shitty to me, as I will be dreading over this...But I can't just brush aside something that is important to me...

The best thing about nightmares is that, it seem so real until u wake up of course...and be relived at the fact that it was after all a dream.

Sometimes I believe it tend to be some message from GOD...but to say that I belive in that kinda of notion is a bit far fetch due to my unstability now... WHen I woke up just now, I really needed some1 to talk to. But then again who on their right mind would wanna entertain a person like me, especially early in the morning....And so here I am, thanking my blog for being a medium to express my unplesantness...

Maybe because I was pissed of with a friend yesterday that inflicted my brain with such trauma...And the waves did its work....Everything is in the mind, but I dont belive a mind can generate something that we are not accustommed of...Else why am I getting nightmares of people related to me. and not some people whom I never met before..Logical isn't it...

But that nightmare, maybe is really telling me something...Maybe its trying to make me realise something...Again, its my mind, only my desires or hatred would have caused it. So either way I am the cause of the whole trouble...What if it is really a message of God. I heard preachers preaching about how God spoke to them..What if God did speak to me this time...How do anyone knows that God is the one speaking to them....and its not their brain that's going ballistic...I need that kind of direction to set my path straight...I am worried about how I may have misinterpreted the entire message..What if I my misinterpretation leads to more misery in my life, when I could have interpreted it the right way and headed towards glory....I really don't know...

Guess it is time I finally got back to my dust collecting bible...But then again what kind of assurance is there...What kind of security is there...I am so damn fuckin' messed up....How the heck am I supposed to move on, when my past keeps on hautning me... Unless I find the answers to these, I can never fuckin move on....

Where Fantasy and Reality Cross Paths.......I need answers.........